Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
Im so hungover
Come over i have rolls
Ecstasy rolls or Challah rolls?
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
i was about to rearrange the room but realized that this is the only efficient setup where we can have sex while the other one's asleep without them accidentally seeing.
Yeah, well I just made $600 while taking a shut cause two diff clients called while I was in here. Tell me being a lawyer doesn't kick ass.
This is the first time I have ever hoped it's poison ivy on my cock
See, it wasn't that I broke my nose having sex. Its that I forgot about the bedposts...
I smell like a skunk, but I'm okay with that.
Shaving your balls drunk sounds like a good idea untill you do it
I have a cat for love and a booty call for sex. What else could I need?
I love you as a roommate, but you GOTTA start using the door dude..
Just sold our expired ticket for a free night of bowling to a drunk guy downtown for 50 bucks. Ill buy beer on my way home
I was like ahh were on two different pages, I know there's rumors of me moving to boston but I can't and I'm not adding long distance to the relationship I have with my 31 year old recently divorced ex boss
i did these weird ass ab exercises once that left me queefing for weeks
Randomize
