I got drunk at the beach today. I got the word Badass! tatooed all the way across my foot. Probably a bad idea.
i want to be waterboarded, just to see what all the fuss is about
i wish my penis had a tongue
even the sluttiest version of myself will not go down on him
23 Crazy Psychological Tricks You Have To Try on Someone RIGHT NOW
I just realized that two weekends in a row we ended up in a bathroom with two different boys asking us for a threesome. does this happen to everyone?
We're gonna have the chick that teaches kindergarteners to fold origami roll the joints.
Wait so they unscrewed the bathroom door to find you naked?
It's not that I'm in love with her, so much as I would love to be her lesbian experience.
New found love of volunteering, when there's free wine available at all times. Good times. And I get to to feel good about helping people.
These 25 People Forgave their Significant Others for Saying Stupid Things
Clearly it doesn't get better with age. Just more sexual
I would love a rich wife. Then I would be like a gym teacher or some shit. Bigfoot hunter maybe.
I called him a "Beautiful Bastard" with "Beautiful Bastard Hair". That is how you pick up a guy from Denmark.
Mind if I sleep with your cousin? If I can... thanks. If no, sorry its gonna happen.
Do me a favor and scream dirty things at him in a polite sexy, come hither way
just found a picture from last night.
the one of you riding a horse with nothing but a bulletproof vest on?