You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
I just saw a stripper wear a tube top around her floppy gut. God bless Michigan.
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
I spit up blood this morning
That's vegas.
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also. he gave me a foot massage during 69ing when i got a cramp. he's a winner.
Congratulations, you fucked a nickle into me.
Please tell me your aunt didn't see the Brita pitcher full of condom wrappers. We had at least 100.
Sorry if this is weird, but please don't have sex in my truck. I get to be the first...
As I was sneaking out of his house last night his moms lover was sneaking in, he held the door for me...
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came home to a trail of roses from the door halfway up the stairs. but my nonsingle roommate lives downstairs. idk if they celebrated on the stairs or if some girl tried to woo me last night and i don't remember
But the drunk streaking fizzled when one of jake's friends took a piss while running with a massive erection.
Well watching will be involved...it'll just most likely be of me licking your penis instead of me trying to understand how Hans Solo goes up against the Galactic Empire...
AHHHHHHHHH. I LEFT A GLASS NEXT TO ME WHEN I FELL ASLEEP I'M SO SURE IT WAS WATER BUT NOW IT'S VODKA JESUS MADE A STOP
.......he just venmo charged me for the burrito I was eating while he broke up with me
I like the new guy, he keeps beer in the fridge.
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