So bad night, ended up beating off to porn and eating Keebler elf cookies.... at the same time :-(
I'm sitting by myself in my bra eating a waffle and drinking pineapple rum. gamedaaaayyyyyyy
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
woke up holding a soft boiled egg cup and empty bottle of rum. apparently i couldn't find a shot glass
First memory of my senior year: Going into registration still drunk from last night.
A black suburban rolled up and a scary suited guy got out the passenger side and opened the door for her as she got in. Then drive off. Who did I just fuck?
I think I'm going to go into my next therapy session with hot client with my fly down and when he tells me about it I'm going to say "how did that happen?!" and then porn music will start to play.
You'd think the neighbors would be used to grown men coming into my house drunk at 230 am.
I cried over the lack of milkshakes I've consumed in the last month
I was just randomly reminded of the night you were wrapped up in a bed sheet carrying a full bottle of cookie dough vodka and warning neighbors of the weirdos running around
We smoked before the sunrise hike. I ended up eating a banana and singing Circle of Life as the sun rose over the horizon.
gin. gin. Gin. GIN GIN GINGINFFdJH
I slept with my wedding DJ..... I think this means my life has come full circle
Definitely woke up.this morning to a random girls head in my toilet and her mom knocking on my door.
i got drunk and started dancing with the plant because you were out of town
Randomize
