My ass is singing 4 different tunes right about now... Taco Bell was a bad idea!
Pissed on my Blackberry at the Astros game. Wish me luck explaining that one at work.
I wish there was a Glade Plug-in for vaginas
I sometimes forget that turkeys are alive even when its not Thanksgiving.
he refused to get me toilet paper before we started drinking so I keep wiping with his towel.
bring money and cleavage
debating whether or not to save the package from my first plan b pill. it would be a nice addition to any baby book.
We left an ass print on the piano.
It's great having no responsibilities. In normal life I would be freaking the fuck out right about now. But the only worry I have from last night is where i got this shower caddy full of cookies. God I love college.
Yeah I don't remember why I went to the hospital though but I just called and they have my wallet
Just wanted to say a big ole FUCK YOU for coming out to mom the day before I have to drive with her for 6 hours. Ass hat.
You could woo kevin with a boquet of breakfast burritos. He loves those burritos. You could use the hot sauce packets like babies breathe
Sometimes I just want to kiss you without you pulling ur cock out and waving it at me
Does this mean I have to put a bra on now
I used the line "you don't have enough pillows". Then left. Thought you should know.
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