she requested me as her brother on facebook.... biggest. letdown. ever.
I'm so proud of us for fucking the same friend group before we met in a completely unrelated instance.
they're like a gay fantastic four
I told myself this year would be different, I wouldn't get "pee in a fish tank drunk".. Got to the girls house... Fish tank in her room.. 2 years in a row.. had to keep the tradition going
It's barely 9 am & I've already had an ice cube IN my vagina
i think that after ALREADY drinking that much, the tube shots may have been a bad idea.. i mean afterall, i did wake up and find my cell phone IN the bonfire the next morning.
no, forget the keg and come see this. prego pants here is dunking chicken nuggets into pudding and crying over a cat show on animal planet.
The cops raided her house the day before class even started
Those assholes are becoming so efficient
He asked me what I wanted the cake to say and I then asked him if "I'm sorry for throwing up in your bed last night" was too long. He said it was...
I just try to date guys based on what I need like I am trying to find an electrician now
You gays are geniuses
Also, beer. Big fan.
I wish I were single again so I could actually have sex.
I've never had sex that lasts this long though. It's ridiculous. I feel like I need a Gatorade and a sweatband and a sub.
If you break up with me one more time it's over.
so my parents definitely heard me when I was cumming last night...
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