whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
im going to forcibly insert an angry corn snake into his urethra
well my last 2 orgasms were over shoe sales at macy's. what does that tell you?
my history teacher totally just suggested that we record his lectures and play drinking games with them later so that we pay attention to the material.
apparently i'm really good at getting wasted, having sex all night, getting multiple hickeys and oversleeping father's day brunch. this is the third year its happened.
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
What sexual position says im sorry for your loss?
Bring my gorilla suit and my bong.
Oh its going to be that type of weekend?
Dude, you were dipping oreos in vodka and asking people to try it, "It's so good!"
Oh. My. God. You texted my mom "IM BACK BITCHES!"
We kind of broke a table making out. So yes, I'd say it was successful.
I could definitely fill a shot glass w my cum
please don't
Probably gonna run and pray I throw up. Then go get a coffee/bagel & continue to rally
I AM DRUNK AND AGGRESSIVE ABOUT CURLING!
The US is in the finals, aren't they.
I think I hear the ice cream truck
I could be going crazy though
NO IT IS THE ICE CREAM TRUCK IT'S ALMOST AT YOUR STOP
Randomize
