i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
She is my favorite of all the girls you have fucked. Other than me.
Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them?
Aunt Jean just announced that her pubic hair is getting thicker as her head hair gets thinner. As a family we are just not a people of mystery.
I misunderstood what a threesome is. Please come pick me up.
Omg i either met the gayest dude ever or my next boyfriend
All I wanna do is sit in water and get drunk. The only thing more American is giving birth to eagles.
Valium party in the driveway. Attendance: 1. Don't make me do this alone.
Just remember that she is a giant dick-sucking forehead and you are better than that.
How's your threesome situation going?
Optimistic
I'm pretty sure I just crapped out my pancreas. I have 2 of those, right?
You threw up on yourself mid conversation with your mom and then told her a girl at the party puked on you.
Jesus himself couldn't make a better sandwich
FINE YOU CAN EAT HOT WINGS WHILE WE HAVE SEX
At least your road beer policy is responsible. Well, relatively speaking.
Randomize