hot girl, 5 o clock
do you know how to read a clock?
then she came back into the room with a neckbrace on. i thought she was getting ready for the pounding of a lifetime.
She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
it was 6 in the morning, and you cried until i put mulan in. then you proceeded to say every word, not to mention sing along... stop drinking.
Too drunk to talk to museum staff. So much for proper wednesdays
You had the genius idea to tape beer to the celing fan. There goes his security deposit. He is gonna be fuckin pissed.
He doesn't care. He wouldn't care if my vag grew arms and smacked him in the face.
This is actually a pretty big deal for him. I mean, he contacted a stranger out of concern for someone else instead of for sex.
That does show growth.
they told me if I wanted to live here I had to get an ass tattoo and then they all mooned me simultaneously. ass tattoos as far as the eye could see.
She kept calling herself DJ McDonalds and said she wanted to make some Egg McMusic.
are you listening to the theme from Jurassic Park whilst pooping?
I'm at the back whiskey bar with a 7 and 7 in a winnie the pooh costume. Come find me.
Christ I forgot how flexible you need to be for a decent sext pic. Jesus.
I get so sad when I watch him slowly destroy his life with whiskey and cocaine. Then he bites my neck and I just want to fuck him. I can't help it.
I would accept a super bowl ring as an engagement ring
Randomize