wakey wakey hands off snakey
come outside for a special surprise it involves huge boobs
Its way too early to be sitting naked at his dining room table...
tonight is proof that a xbox 360 will always be more reliable than a girl ever will
and a girl gets the red ring of death every month
I just put up a picture on my dorm room wall of that ginger you hooked up with to remind myself that everyone makes mistakes
I kinda volunteered your dick to help her deal with her virginity issues. Figured you wouldn't mind.
She literally pulled the door off the hinges and "dropped" it down the stairs... Do I just say 'good job' and put her to sleep?
I just listened to "Eye of the Tiger" and did 5 shots to prep going over to see him.
We lost power at midnight which freaked out my roomate and friends. The power came back on 30 minutes later. We are now at the bar having "the rapture came and we were left behind" shots
she was braiding my hair and singing forever young while she vommed everywhere at the same time. Talent.
I have no idea what those words in that order meant, but if you go to Florida send me pics of strippers
Dude, they hit that lizard part of my brain that tells me to fuck people.
Preach sister.
i like that he makes me laugh. those are like my two favorite things. laughing and fucking.
I got a pots and pans set and a vibrator. Merry Crisis.
she gave me a ride on the back of her motor scooter and i swooned so hard
omg it's like all of your grease 2 fantasies come true i'm so happy for you
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