im gay
i know
yea but for you.
he pissed his pants, and she still wants to hook me up with him. I try not to date guys with bladder control problems... Unless they're loaded anyway.
I just had a dude tell me how he got fired from friendly's for tripping a kid and followed the story with "If i'm gonna do it, I do it big."
So you honestly dont remember putting honey in your bong? You kept talking about how you wanted to become a bee and fly
the jolly green giant just puched the pope. halloween is the best.
in retrospect, i probably shouldn't have referred to his dick as "travel size"
Retelling stories from our semester makes me realize we need to get tested for herpes.
I'm sorry i ruined our friendship with a boner
We bought home drug tests to see which of us could make it look more like a kaleidoscope. What happened to the days of innocent fun trying to best everyone with a breathalyzer?
you took a potato out of your pocket and just started eating it raw. don't know where the potato came from though
21st birthday = success
Just to warn you I probably wont be able to do anything that involves standing up
My life is like a drunken tornado. All over the place and never passing up fat girls
I feel like a pizza delivery girl of vagina tho
im shaving my vagina and listening to frank sinatra, im coming over after
first he passed out on the toilet...then hugged it and screamed no no no as i tried to pull him out
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