just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
Making out with married ex girlfriends: priceless
The world would be so much better with thought bubbles.
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
he just kept repeating that I have nice areolas
a cabby told me that vodka is the coors light of liquor, and then gave me his number
we found you outside the hotel room sleeping with a note next to you that said " we made sure you were comfortable, hope your friends come back soon"
Hey, just wanted to let you know that University Police stopped by and repossessed the stolen laundry basket. And the 8 bottles of detergent.
It's like I opened a door and behind it lay mythical creatures sprinklin fairy dust upon the land leading me to a pot of gold. And that gold is some delicious cock.
Who knew drunk me could climb a 17 story building for apple juice and sex
I think I'll handle my grief by throwing myself headlong into lesbianism. Seems like a fitting tribute to you.
I rocked my own world, he was just a prop.
I was so hungover at work I had my shirt on backwards. I had no idea how I managed to get through today puke free.
Fuck you. Fuck this party. I just wanted to be pretty with a cute little tiara and boys sucking my tits, now i have a hangman game drawn on my face and jello shots in my hair.
I wanted to give you a great birthday party. You know I did.
Randomize
