either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
Rescue me. My white trash great uncle just pulled out his belly at the restaurant to show us how big this woman's tit was
Whenever I'm sad I just imagine if babies were born with mustaches...
So I'll spare the details, but I think I discovered I'm lactose intolerant. In my sleep. And you'll be needing new sheets.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Are they hot? And are the slutty? These are my concerns for any wedding. You say yes, and yes, I will be your best man
My mom just used the words "ice cunt". It may be an interesting day afterall.
I've never seen anyone write a check for a bar tab before
I'm taking it from the chunk of pizza I just pulled out my hair that we ate pizza last night?
We left your bucket of puke on your doorstep to clean out yourself. You're welcome.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
I'm wearing a suit and have no chance of getting laid or robing a casino. I consider this opportunity a failure
I don't know. Sometimes you can be a wild card with your emotions. Mostly the emotion known as anger.
Well, let's just say, I got that eye patch like we were joking about
And one groomsman rode a suitcase cart like a skateboard until he crashed and took out a piece of sheet rock. Later he pulled out his nuts.
I paid for lunch, then he made a bunch of holes in my wall and destroyed my bathroom.
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