He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics
i cant even explain all the reasons why i dont want to fuck you right now.
I gave him a handjob while watching the presidential address. Needless to say, it was weird.
He was rambling about life and dignity and happiness. but all i kept thinking was PENIS. YOU HAVE A PENIS. I CAN SHOW YOU WHERE TO PUT THAT PENIS.
This weekend was suppose to be a 'smoke weed and stare at things' weekend. Not a 'spend all my rent money partying with Europeans till 8 am' weekend
Yeah but those French chicks did get naked
It was ths the worst 15 minutes of my life. . . It was like fucking a warm stick of butter.
I'm going through a really dark time right now
I don't want to hear it man. I just jerked it to a pic of my ex wife in a bikini. Buck up
Only Tommy would bring a stripper pole to a bonfire
Well i would have gone to the bar but Satan decided to hold his rituals in my uterus.
My feelings for him are donzo molonzo but I can't turn down a pierced penis...
if you're not jumping for joy when you see penis then you're looking at the wrong ones.
I just want to eat chicken fingers and drink beer and smoke in bed with my laptop so I can watch Netflix
So your not doing THAT great with the break up then...
It does not feel like it was just this morning that I had a penis in multiple cavities of my body
Is it weird that my mother is taking body shots off my gf after meeting once?
There's wax on my nightstand, my sheets look like Christmas, and my vagina feels like it got into a fight. All signs of a good night
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