I have demons in me.
just saw a DUI checkpoint outside of a taco bell...i feel like thats cheating...
I wanna dance tonight. i just wanna grind my ass in some man's dick.
I just saw a pair of panties stretched over a fire hydrant on campus... I need to get the fuck out of this town
Whats the name of the guy with his hand down my pants?
Can we please just celebrate being alive this far into the school year and just get drunk?
Last night was the twilight zone. We hungout with our 45 year old future selves and tried to fuck everything with a dick. Lets move forward from this.
nothing like smoking out of your roommate's bong with your mom to celebrate the rising of christ
he is risen halelujah
I inadvertently smoked 6 blunts at one time. We just kept passing them around...I didn't know what happened until it was over. I can't walk.
Like I feel like I use my high IQ for the wrong things
I dressed up as a "typical white girl" which meant I wore my yoga pants and uggs all night. BEST. IDEA. EVER. Most comfy halloween everrrr.
i don't know if this is a cannibal joke or a sexual innuendo, and i think that's a beautiful description of our relationship.
He doesn't want a full on relationship, he provides me with all the weed I can handle and gives me multiple mind blowing orgasms. He's my soul mate.
I woke up naked wrapped in a wolf blanket on the bathroom floor
I’m sorry I got high and yelled about the patriarchy.
Randomize
