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just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
It's sad how good I am at giving people diseases
There was jim beam in your oven. I just preheated it.
At one point during the moaning he reminded me of Forrest Gump
My freaking DENTIST just commented on my hickies. Through the novacaine I managed to mumble 'It was my birthday' and she smiled knowingly.
I either just got cockblocked or saved from a lengthy court case so I'm kinda conflicted about how my night went.
Should we pre-order food to the ER for cinco de mayo?
I know how to make vodka btw in case you want to come over and do a science project
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
That's not a current picture, because if you look deep enough into my eyes you can still see morals. Not these days.
The only way he could ever pleasure me is if he lit himself on fire and let me watch
Every time I start to trust vodka, it does this to me.
You know it's bad when I'm eating a cold chicken breast alone in bed 😕
The cure for a hangover evidently is not walking around in a costume in the sun towards of park of screaming children
Randomize
