Crosby and Malkin: Two girls, one cup.
no one is going to fuck you in a field of bunnies
you may be an alcoholic when your drug dealer calls to yell at you for drinking too
I was curling my hair today and I looked at my curling iron and thought...
You at least unplugged it right?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
All the walks of shame were condensed into the hour before parents started showing up. Move out day is so bittersweet
Fuck him. I'll set him on fire for you. Then we'll see how good of a firefighter he is.
Still bad at ganbling. Still good at dringing.
We're drinking vodka. Wine is for people who have to wake up in the morning.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There no better feeling of self control than stopping yourself before telling your girlfriend she gives head just like her sister.
WHY AM I CRAWLING IN OLDER MEN HOLY JESUS
My new hobby is moving his stuff to random places in the house. Good luck making a smoothing at 6:30 in the morning, the blender top's in the dog food container
yeah, I don't think I'm getting into the baseball game tonight. The security guard definitely saw me bowl over that child.
Should I wish him a happy birthday?
Well he has been inside of you enough times that you probably should.
Umm I might be late. Also I am may or may not have mayonnaise on my ass
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