I still think their baby is ugly. I also still think it's yours.
So do you want to come over? ;)
Never again opening up the Pandora's box of crazy that is your vagina. Sorry.
I just farted for five sidewalk sections! New personal best.
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
Jesus people on campus asked me what i do for joy. I said i love sinning especially pre-marital sex.
My vagina is scared and excited at the same time. It might not be able to sleep tonight.
ill give you a picture of me naked for $5. im desperate.
White grape blunt wraps are like the equivalent of a glass of wine in a tux.
I'm hungover and surrounded by children and Republicans. What did I do to deserve this?
I was dressed in monkey onesie serving people vodka jelly with a spoon...
The rest of the concert I just stared at the lights and didn't really listen to the music cuz I was trying to make sure my brain still worked cuz my face was numb and I couldn't move... Yeah I'm not a weed brownie person
The paramedics were not my fault this time.
Then when he got home he face timed me and showed me his balls
She fucked my eyebrows.. I've never had that done before.
Wait... Plucked, or Fucked?
Fucked, but I understand your need to clarify
Whatever you wanna call it i just wanna get railed tonight
Randomize
