I don't really see how asking you not to cum on my face or hair makes me high maintenance
he can show you his cooooock\nshining, shimmering, splendiddddd
the last guy with this job had a bookshelf fall on him. He's in the Er. Im high and they gave me his shift. How do you think i feel?
I got home and laid by the toilet and then alexa laid in the bathtub and sang the preamble while kayla held my hair
Just keep my face away from hard objects. And by that I do not mean erect penised.... those are totally fine. It's more just things like rocks, table edges, blunt objects, etc so I don't get another concussion.
FYI, grandma is already drunk and using a bed sheet as a table cloth.
maybe if I avoid him long enough we could skip the talking part of "we need to talk"
Just got road head. In broad daylight. On the interstate. During rush hour. Pushing the envelope one public bj at a time.
alright well Taco Bell Closes at 12 so you better pray to god she's asleep by then or I'm running in your house butt ass naked with a bag of tacos
Shout out to my liver for being the true MVP. It easily put in more work than LeBron or Curry this week.
He goes from zero to fucking up in 2.4 drinks. Like the sportscar of bad decision making.
Just imagine a dick squawking like a parrot
so on a scale from morning glass of wine to that time i burnt the garage down how drunk were you last night
About 'lets tie a boat to a truck and ride it down the freeway'
Be careful, there is sex in the air.
She sent a group text pic called "Assemble" of his dick next to her forearm.
I'm down.
Randomize
