Yeah I'm pretty much like lane on gilmore girls except my mom doesn't look so mean all the time.
coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
No it wasn't her, this girl had both hands.
yeah, and then after the convo was clearly over, my dad decides to scream "SIZE MATTERS" just to make things even more uncomfortable.
I just can't bring boyfriends home.
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
He was going down on me and raised up for a minute, slipped and punched me in the face. My lady boner left immediately.
Apparently there was a point in the night that they literally thought he was dead, ass naked on the floor. That bad.
We fucked in my basement while hiding from the cops.. And now his Facebook picture is him and others holding up there MIP's in front of my house.. I feel obligated to add him as a friend.
hooked up with the gay kid & his friend's mom told me "you know he has a identical twin brother whose straight, right?"
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
I am too young to be this hungover
Is this your way of saying you want a sober 19th?
Worst part of blacking out... Waking up and having to do the teeth check
He actually just looked up and said I'm gonna cum in my pants. and he did. no shame.
Doing 9 month old dishes in my bath tub. These dishes literally had enough time to gestate a human child
She dumped me and then asked if I wanted to come to her improv show. Fuck theatre majors, man.
Randomize