THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
ok, I understand that your bathroom door is broken, but at least close the blinds next time you take a shit. The entire parking garage just watched you.
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
fuck that im pissed. when I come back im ripping forskin off.
No, pictures of your dick will not make me feel better about my grandmother having a brain tumor.
I can't help but be optimistic. I'm like a ball of slutty sunshine.
there were staples in my comforter. what kind of sex did we even have?
If I'm going to start compromising my butthole it's going to be for much better drugs than a ventolin
You are not going to get a pat on the back from me for not fucking that 40 year old again.
You know your night is done when the police confiscate your bra at high school basketball game
I think my sex life is about to turn into a war on two fronts
She's asleep in a fisher-price toy car
I’m not dating him for his personality. I’m dating him so I can steal his dog.
He just compared fucking my vagina to a snow flake falling on his forehead: gentle.... I'm not sure if that's a compliment or not.
Randomize
