it hurts more in the daytime
she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
dude i just heard a girl tell another girl 'what part of im trying to get laid tonight dont u understand?'
needless to say i wont be back home tonight
I think i just got paid for sex with a hot pocket... and i accepted
This freshman just ran out of her seat in a 200 person lecture, opened the emergency door and vommed everywhere. Then quietly went back to her seat. $2 Pitchers hit someone hard last night.
Someones grandma was rubbing my back. I'm way too high for this.
The stripper just invited me to take shots with him out at his car after he gets off stage.. I mean why not? I've already seen everything he's got and it'll be easy to get him naked.
She said she'd heard about my nickname in high school. Apparently sledgehammer isn't as popular as you'd believe...
i didnt have any regrets until i found out he was a freshman.... and the only reason he got into yale was because of soccer... and he wasnt premed.
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
I have fireworks and redbull; let's make heart attack inducing magic happen.
Btw, do you want me to fix this with a box of wine and a chick flick or is this more of a 'lets head to the strip club' problem? I'm just trying to analyze the emotional depth of the situation.
Jk probs not coming. Tequila
The guy got mobbed on, all hell broke loose. About 20 cops showed up, and this kid somehow convinced a cop that letting him pee in front of him is justifiable. This guy could sweet talk Hellen Keller, he was THAT good
It's a lot harder to work after sex than it is to work drunk... just saying.
Randomize
