i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
If God's watching us, we might as well be entertaining
so stoned i ashed in my jack and coke like 4 times. drinking it anyway
my mom just called and warned me someone is trying to serve me, i feel like i'm playing an extreme game of hide and go seek these next weeks
I can't wait to see her breast feed this thing
She volunteers at a homeless shelter. You volunteered to drink 7 day expired milk for $3. No chance. Give up.
You gave the cab driver your pants as collateral while you ran in the house for money.
i climbed out of the bath tub this morning and found him taped to the treadmill
You're not required to sleep with every guy that spends $10 on you.
Just had a horrible realization. I've fucked a guy with a webbed foot AND a guy with a third nipple.
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
NOLA update. Went to Corey Smith at the house of blues last night. Drank PBR and took lots of shots of Jack. Too drunk, cabbed it to the hotel and fell asleep while having sex. Not my finest moment. Now I'm in court. I can't wait to be your attorney.
there were rolls with just one bite out of each one leading to the bedroom. you were laying on the bed naked and yelled 'you did it you followed the bread crumbs!'
She shouldn’t care what consenting adults do behind closed doors
You do realize it was her husband you were hooking up with behind that door, right?
Why do so many fanfic writers want to see hockey players get pregnant?
Randomize
