Hey look on the bright side if youre preg at least you know it and wont have it in a toilet
Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
Having dinner with my dad, watching the news and some AIDS prevention ad comes on. My dad then kindly informs me that he doesn't enjoy the feel of condoms.
How the hell am I supposed to know what lotion to get her? They should have a dressing booth where I could go test how good it is for jerking off, then I'd know.
i didnt mean to paint the dog... it just kinda happened
The lawn was on fire, but I fixed it.
What do you mean you don't pregame your bikini waxes?
you took my bottle from me saying i was unprepared for its magical qualities. then you buckled it in the backseat.
If you wake up tomorrow and start to wonder.... Yes you did just eat mild sauce from taco bell out of the package while informatively yelling about the loss of my virginity
if any part of your body has ever entered my vagina you are fucking obligated to speak to me if i so desire
There's someone howling in the parking lot. Haha.
You could be a whistle.. And just ask bitches if they want to blow you all night
Like 50% of me thinks it'll be weird, 25% of me is curious & 25% of me is horny
You brought string cheese to the strip club
You have better ratings than Crest. Only 4/5 dentists recommend it. You have 8/9 recommendation for your blowjob skills.
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