I sat a few seats down and one row behind a cute girl at the Cubs game today. Having watched her talk to the guy next to her, I found out only her name and age. I then used that information and pieced it together with over 500 girls on Facebook with the same name. I found the same girl, and we're now fbook friends.
if being a creepy fuck was an olympic sport, they'd think you were using performance enhancing drugs...
Theres a baby at this concert double fisting pacifiers. shes gunna do great in college.
You know what sound is wonderful for a hangover? Listening to the horns from the South Africans at the world cup
They just both started mumbling "i cant go home like this" "it's all over my face" "do you have extra pants?"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
saw a man tazing a raccoon in the middle of the street last night... normal
We were laying in the basement dry humping to the rhythm of the washing machine
does the girl puking in my garbage belong to you?
At this point if I didn't go to work hungover I think the whole place would think something is wrong
Ways to ruin a one night stand: the guy finds your parenting magazine on your dorm room desk.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Out of curiosity, do you feel happiness for you, or sadness for ME, that you are the only one I drunk text?
I just found your ripped underwear on my chandelier. Care to explain?
I don't understand why you're so excited, it's my vagina not yours.
I forgot what I was gonna say, but I'm pretty excited to not be pregnant.
Dude, fuck these noisy kids, fuck all this light, and fuck you for getting to sleep while I have to be productive and hungover.
Where'd you go?
Laundry, im. A responsible drunk
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