dude, you're never picky with who you hook up with, have a little dignity
nah man, chicks are like pokemon, gotta catch \'em all
I bet her clit looks like pig in a blanket.
I'm still with the girl from last night. remember to call me conrad and that i work for PETA
i just know my balls have never hurt this bad before
before you smothered your pizza in mayo you blotted it with a napkin saying you were trying to watch your fat intake
I need to move out. I just walk of shamed my way into a family breakfast party. There's no response when grandma says "where you coming from in heels at 9AM?"
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
Made dad pull of the highway twice on the way home so I could puke. Yeah i'd say we ended the semester well.
hungover waitressing a bar association event. im being judged by actual judges.
I'm washing down the sadness with shots of vodka.
fuck whipped cream. I'd eat vegetables off those abs
He cried & told me I reminded him off his mother. I don't want to talk about it. I want to drink about it.
lets start a news segment called WHY IS LEOS CROTCH BURNING TODAY
No idea who's grandma but people were just running around naked
Randomize
