you hand the children out the window. i'll pour the drinks.
was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
Just saw a Mexican guy pushing a stroller with 3 twelve packs of corona in it with a toddler struggling to keep up on foot behind him
What's your middle initial? I need it for the census. I put us down as "unmarried partners."
Oh my god... you're gay. Ps, its A.
No no. According to the 2010 US Census, we're gay.
Every time I hit my bowl my neighbors set off fireworks... I stop, they stop. I start again, they start again. Too high for this.
just found out this city drinks more beer during oktoberfest than rhode island does in a year.. i'm never leaving
Thanks for the ave Maria song you left on my phone that lasted for TEN minutes.
he was cradling you in his arms feeding you rum straight from the bottle and you kept sucking his fingers.
what part of what i said meant "bring a bowl"
"bouncy castle"
It felt like he was juggling my kidneys with the head of his penis... If you could even call it that, it was more like a lochness monster. Huge and mythical.
wait, how does the 20 year old one night stand pregnant girl have a superiority complex?
I feel like I'm in an ocean of eels jacking me off
I'm giving random strangers at the bar sips of my fishbowl, then telling them I have Ebola. It's a fun night.
At least I got steroids and a baguette out of the deal
You asked me how red your eyes were... they were shut.
Randomize