We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
Sign #1 this conference will suck: Ice breaker question, how many proud virgins do we have in the room, overwhelming response. Looks like I'm not getting laid this weekend.
One of my residents in my hall just found my positive pregnancy test from last year I hid behind the fridge, I'm just going to tell them it was for a science project.
So I'm driving and this guy next to me at the stop light is reving his engine and honking at me. Motherfucker thinks that's because I'm asian and drive a honda I'm automatically going to race him
i perioded on his leg
on. his. leg.
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
he told me he was a chubby chaser.. then winked. i'm signing up for a gym pass as we speak
Um I think everyone drunk and there's some douche on violin.
After all the hair products he's stolen from me, he better fucking be gay.
My Grandma made me promise not to drink more beer, so I'm chugging wine.
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
I actually cannot wait for your visit. I miss people who make me look like the virgin mary in comparison.
Sex in the moonbounce later?
This is why I love you.
I told some guy on tinder, that apparently has a prosthetic leg, that I think we started off on the wrong foot. I hate myself...
My GF, FWB and Side piece are all booty calling me. I’m a victim of my sexual success
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