Dude, I'm in her bathroom and there's crab shampoo... is it worth the risk?
You're missing what this discovery implies... she's got a fucking bush.
I wish there were wingman of the year awards.
Hurry. And bring back up. SHE WON'T STOP TALKING.
Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
sorry i walked in and ruined it, but i had to laugh she looked like a pile of bologna the way you had her pinned up on the wall
y-o-u-r-e = you are, y-o-u-r = your. you are a bag of douche not your bag of douche. if you're going to insult me at least do it in proper english. that is all.
Just had to explain to a senior manager why I had duct tape residue on my wrist and hand. This weekend was a success.
Haha, you kept saying the cop was going to give you a ride home b/c "that's his job, it's summer."
Oh god I think I promised some guy from high school that I'd be his fuck buddy in like 3 months
So the old dude that tried to fight me is definitely Katie's dad. And the pot cookie's kicking in. Shit is getting weird.
How was my weekend? I just blew my nose and a gram of coke fell out. My weekend was fantastic.
It's like bringing a chick home from the bar the night before and waking up to thinking you are about to go another round... Just to wake up and find she's already left...
he forgot we were at my place and not his so he tried kicking me out of my own apartment by saying "so, you can go whenever you want...."
Was there a condom involved? Because he was saying he wanted a kid. Repeatedly.
Was so close to hoppin on it but then I realize it's not a dick and I needed to keep walking. Primal instincts.
Note to self: never fuck a Canadian, surprisingly highly disappointing
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