u know ur drinking tonight lol i dont know why you try to deny it
but i dont wanna get emotional and drunk text
then give me ur phone
NEVER!!
I'm at subway, this 8 year old kid is judging my fashion sense with his dad. I want to kill myself.
It's ok, he's just 8, he's not judging you.
He just asked why I'm sitting alone. I honestly want to cry.
so i was supposed to be to work at 8..but its 9:15 and im currently standing stoned in the middle of holiday...with a bag with three doughnuts, two redbulls, and a slim jim..
god i miss watching you do this...
She has an incinerator in her basement. Have you ever incinerated used condoms?
Lmao what?
It's a yes or no question.
i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
The fact that its 10am on a gameday and I have yet to shotgun is absurd
Just been one of those weeks where alcohol out weighs friendship
Well it looked like you were having a fucking apiphany sitting at the toilet with a t shirt around your head
How's dating the med student working out for you?
After we had sex last night he showed me where my spleen was.
A true anatomy project.
We're going to party like we don't have spanx on
I just had a very enlightening conversation with my hat. we need more of whatever the fuck that was.
You could totally spank that new found Catholicism out of him.
And then I was like pick your blow job song and he choose the sonic the hedgehog theme song. If he's not the one no one is.
Just saw a commercial for non alcoholic baileys cream. WHAT THE HELL IS THE POINT?!
Randomize
