Tell him to shut up cuz i said so. I lost my dollar shoe :(
Fell asleep in bio again. Sometimes i feel like college is just one really expensive nap.
I need input, can I pre-game my cat scan?
me neither. i remember bell pepper tequila but not why or yelling
Hahaha, I forgot about doing shots out of the bell pepper
Yeah, well I just made $600 while taking a shut cause two diff clients called while I was in here. Tell me being a lawyer doesn't kick ass.
Headed to the bar now. If I smell faintly of latex and tuna, it's just the new scent I'm trying.
Might just stay in and drink cuz of the hurricane. Yea I think Wisconsin might be safe but its a good reason to drink.
because drunk making out is frowned upon in museums i think
what's the appropriate greeting for someone whose bed you've had sex with someone else in?
I'm not even mad. I was just trying to get a boner, you're the one that had to see that
Is this a drinking picnic?
Is there another kind?
I don't want to just break his heart, I want to dip it in liquid nitrogen and then smash it until it's powder and snort the powder
How to not get laid: tell him he reminds you of your brother. While having sex. Thanks, vodka.
Hey did you take a shower last night at like 4am?
"ummm...." (Thinking in my head) wet towel, soaking wet hair, clean pjs on backwards... "that would make more sense then what I thought happened..."
How do you feel about a threesome?
Will you be there?
I'm the one asking!
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