After last night, I could never be a politician.
I was happy to be the center of attention..until i realized why everyone was staring
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
hey dont come home for a while, moms drunk and is telling the story of 'how she met dad at that orgy' again
Maybe if i steal enough bar glasses i can justify all the money spent i've spent there
if this hangover is indicative of how 2011 is gonna be, i want nothing to do with it
I am literally using a balloon as a pillow on a park bench.
She thought that based on the way she feels that she got drugged last night, but come on, her turn on word is hello, who needs to drug that??
I heard liver failure is in for 2012 anyways
Yes. I am getting trashed on an open tab while judging a karoke competition
Impressive. I approve.
I took 20 bucks from you because when I woke up I saw more of you than I ever wanted to see bro.
Totally acceptable.
I have learned that if you don't want to hook up with the guy who walked you home, food is great compensation.
I'm like still hungover from the quinceanera.
Why is there a wet sock in my garbage? Why did I chug so much red wine? Why was someone signing into my iCloud account at 4 am in China? Why do I do self-destructive reckless things? So many questions.
He took off all my clothes, fingered me, than said "would you be more comfortable if I was naked too?"
Randomize
