You had me at "you have a nicer rack then her"
Yea, i was tied up and blindfolded. And someone was throwing chicken nuggets at my face.
I had a guy present me his prison release form this morning as id
I jumped on his cock in 2 seconds flat. Thanks mom for sending me to gymnastics when I was a kid.
I was throwing up in the shower. He was throwing up on me. It was a cute couple moment for us.
I just found out via Facebook that my old dorm room is now the free condom distribution room on campus...IT'S LIKE THE UNIVERSE KNOWS!
Oh and no more ball pics to my family. Got in a little trouble over that. They have no sense of humor.
I kind of want to throw a lot of things at him. Mostly blunt, heavy objects.
after giving head I just always feel like I need like. ice cream. as both a means of getting the lingering sperm out of my mouth, and a congratulations.
Buying the inflatable beer pong table for the pool was one of the best investments I've ever made
My booty call fought through ice and a foot of snow to get here. He brought booze, food, and cigarettes for three days. My vagina is the greatest motivator of all time.
once he tried to wake me up from my hangover nap to have sex, that's when things went downhill. he had to go.
You're just a heartbreaker with a knitting problem
Oh dear God, they have a song about Mom...
Hey, I found that piece of pizza you lost in my bed last night. Never again...
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