He's married, but his wife isn't my neighbor so I don't feel bad about coveting him.
I told my ex i loved him and then he sent me a picture of this girl laying on his bed.
lets start a swedish sibling band together
So currently I have a block of cheese duct taped to my air conditioner in lieu of a fridge.
He just gave a drunken 7 minute speech on how to make the perfect grilled cheese. he explained types of butter and cheeses....i think i love him
remember that response paper i wrote naked, at 745am still drunk with a naked dude in my bed? yeah, totally got an a- on that. and he loved my insight.
i just bought plan b at the bus station. happy holidays and welcome to a new level of white trashiness.
Jason and steven are boiling shrimp in the microwave again
Well right now I am watching him use the fire extinguisher off the pourch.
we had break-up sex in a port-a-potty. how do you think it went?!
If we can put a man on the moon, I'm sure we can turn a pringles can into a bong.
Yeah, I'm sure we have time for sex AND ihop.
I stole $10 from the guy I hooked up with last night.Not sure why but it was definitely more satisfying.
The coast is clear - also, would it bother you if I chose not to wear pants?
I duct taped a bottle of vodka to the back of your closet while you were sleeping in case of emergencies. Go rip it off, it's going to be a long night.
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