bobby jindal makes me wanna cover my ears. you make me wanna smile.
Tittie bar + Mother In law gone = mission accomplished.
6 figure salary? he just got a little cuter.
the only thing keeping me going right now is the knowledge that in 2 hours i'll be drunk at the circus.
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what's an appropriate "I'm fucking your grandson but I'm trying to hide it" outfit?
Just woke up with my keys in one hand and cheesecake in the other.
Everyone knows relationships are a winter sport
I guess I'm in a committed relationship. We just had shot 1 of 3 of Gardasil. I'm now dead inside.
How am I supposed to stop smoking pot when girl scout cookies are being sold.
21 Rideshare Drivers Had to Drive These NSFW Passengers
Cut a hole in the crotch of my onesie so we could have sex without me getting cold. Best decision of my life.
I am pretty sure we beat baby seals over the head in a past life. That is why we are being punished.
hahaha every time i hear a motorcycle i think about that one time you almost died
Thanks for the flashbacks you prick.
At this point it's more of an experiment to see how much actual bush growth is possible. See, being single can be both educational and surprisingly comfy!
You were trust falling into bushes
I'm not saying I love you. I never said I love you. I said that if earth blew up like Krypton you'd be the only person I would like to have inside me when our bodies burn up in a fiery inferno