she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
i think i had to give the cab driver my id to get home last night because i couldnt talk.
im sorry for trying to flush a roll of toilet paper down with my puke. probably not great for your toilet
That's cause you yelled across the parking lot you wanted to eat her out
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm flagged. Drank strippers water. Flashed Dave tryin to get a job here. You order the shots. Green tea betch.
He was drinking wine out of a pyrex measuring cup at two in the afternoon and told me my ass looked fantastic in my sweatpants. I love university
1. Are there men involved 2. Is there food involved 3. Do I have to put pants on 4. Do I have to leave this bed
She was giving me that "well this is awkward since you drunkedly tried to hook up with me" look.
I am one Jewel song away from suicide watch
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Black out Jordan is making huge strides. I didn't even pee on anyone or anything last night.
Showing up to Easter hungover, late, and covered in black an blues from pole dancing. Daughter of the year.
It was fine until they started lighting shots of everclear on fire and making ME take them. That's when shit went down...
You rode your bike four miles to my house. Yelled "I'm so high!" Then crashed into his car. It's a problem.
Lindsey Lohan and I have slept with the same amount of people. The only thing she's now beating me on is rehab trips and teen choice awards, so really I'm the winner.
2 weeks shy of 25 and all I’m wishing for is a secret admirer who pulls my trash cans to the curb Wednesday morning for me because I always forget to Tuesday’s nights thanks to it being dollar draft night at the local bar
Randomize