it was terrible. i could've done a better job by myself.
if i get killed by an online date, its your job to tell my parents that we met at church
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
no they seem fine, they're doing push ups and waiting for a charging toy helicopter
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there are people swimming in the fountain next to the library... hello senior week
Let's just rave with boners that last for hours
Sry I came all over your dress. Think of it as a Vegas souvenir.
My lecture teach is passed out next to me. I think I'm doing pretty good for a freshman.
oh sorry. I thought "boat" was code for "penis"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's a "party harder or raise your standards" kind if night.
she wanted me to tie her up with my playstation charger cord. i kept on hoping she wasn't a squirter. those cords r expensive. could have def been a Sony commercial tho
Desperate times call for desperate measures. But he promised me no small talk so that was nice
no offense but you looked like shit yesterday
tequila is unforgiving..
I didn't expect the hobit to have that much sexual tension.
He was married to his college girlfriend for 20 years. Just give him the blow job he’s been fantasizing about since last century and he’ll be wrapped around your little finger
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