So why didn't Edward and the Cullens just kill Hitler?
You need to stop watching Twilight.
so i decided not to tell her that her fiance is cheating since i already bought the bridesmaid dess
$1.99 mimosas n bloodys til 3. Happy hour starts at 4. We're gonna ride the mechanical bull to kill the hour inbetween.
Please take video.
she actually told me to ignore the cokeheads in the corner with knives.
this is probably the only time in my life that i would want to fuck thomas jefferson
All inclusive resorts are actually just places that livers go to die.
that bad?
u-n-l-i-m-i-t-e-d. f-r-e-e. t-e-q-u-i-l-a.
Cocaine can totally be concealed as MAC finishing powder. Drug dealer creds just went up 120 percent
What am I doing with my life
Sleeping with dudes who have peacocks apparently.
& I just realized there is no vomit smiley. There needs to be a vomit smiley
lesson learned. Never drop acid before a trip to the aquarium. Sounds awesome, is actually terrifying.
with the possibility that i could very easily fall in love with him and i've actually talked to my HUSBAND about it
Immediately after sex he layed on the floor and acted like my yellow bra was pac man
CRAIGSLIST IS NOT THE ANSWER
IM LONELY AND HORNY
I cuddled with a man named Pickles
still can't believe dude took a personal call while he was balls deep in my mouth.
Randomize