there's a booger on my laptop, i suspect it's yours
just caught a 10 year old kid staring at my dick next to me in the urinal. i just nodded to him and said yeah, mines bigger little dude. i gotta stop drinking in public....
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
Your cum is still running out of me. I pity the next person that tries these jeans on....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ya bro it was wild. Hey, is latex digestible?
You know how hard it is to drive a dirtbike down a road with 2 plants of weed on your lap. Fucking hard
Dont make this weird.... I was wondering if I could paper mache a few of your dildos this weekend?
Fyi your toilet is not contaminated. We'd have to scissor pretty hard to pass what I got.
No sex in the champagne room. The champagne room being my life
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Whoever put salsa in the kiddie pool.....your an ass. Fuck you.
We're shaving superhero symbols into our pubes. I call dibs on Batman.
Get my husband this drunk again I will rip off your balls off with my bare hands and then cut them up with a dirty axe like fish bits. Do you understand me? DO YOU UNDERSTAND ME?! See you at breakfast, FUCK FACE. I'll shove that bottle of Jamison so far up your ass you'll still be praying in 2020 you can take a shit! Seriously, you make it hard to be your best friend.
I saw a picture of a baby and it reminded me to take my birth control. Priorities
Are you opposed to me trying out your penis?
I think I’ve been affected by his dad mustache. I wanna ride it.
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