Remember when you weren't going to be a shit show?
then she woke up from sleeping for an hour and the first thing she said was "i regret it already"
Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
You were so high at Ikea last night that you were convinced you could speak Swedish. The whole the time you were our navigator and when we got to the cashier you were hitting on the lady. When she gave you her number you told her you were saving her number as Inglfurfta cuaue she must be swedish since she works there.
it's like iHOP with fire
So fucked up. Can't tell if I'm starving or about to puke. Playing it safe and eating froot loops. Tasty in, colorful out.
Your never gonna wash that desperation outta that sweatshirt you know.
Walt said he was feeding me so I wouldn't die. that's why there was pasta in my room
Remember when we partied so hard that dude died and it cockblocked you hooking up with my sister?
I forgot that happened. That's the second dude that died on a vacation I've been on
i threw up in his garden in front of like five people smoking a joint. they let me have a hit after i was done so it was okay
Dude come to her party. Someone just took a body shot of rubbing alcohol
I need all the beers. I want to be holding on to the grass so I don't fall off the earth drunk.
Can we go out and get blitzed in celebration that they'll be no more surprise kids
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
Btw, you owe me. One (1) orgasm.
Randomize
