I just had one of those nervous system things in my thumb...I'm pretty sure I have cancer.
I bet i've been more pregnant than you.
yours is so small it looks like an acorn!!
so after the bed broke we walked out of the room to a standing ovation
i think i left my bra at your place
It's still hanging from my ceiling fan. Please let me keep it there.
how do I tell the students with a crush on me, that yes, I am open to receiving blowjobs in exchange for grades?
You cleaned out the gashes in your leg from hopping that fence with that whipped cream vodka, didnt you?
did you see me getting spanked by that lady cop who was a guy?
You've gotta make sure the carpets match the drapes, though.
I am not dying my bush blue.
Went into Walmart to get a pregnancy test. Came out with a beta fish and chocolate.
We were sitting outside of the building and he literally just walked up with no pants on. This is the best college ever
These cutoffs are too tight but my ass looks like Freedom
It's acceptable to bring him back to my parents house and fuck on the couch right??
First poop in my apartment for the summer, officially settled in. :)
You were trust falling into bushes
Randomize
