I heard it from a little bird bananas is gonna be there
Is this bird reliable bc I don't wanna be wasted running around the bar asking where bananas is
Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
We had a complete conversation while I was giving him head, at one point he even stopped me and said 'I love how we're just hanging out.'
I only want to screw him when I'm drunk. Problem is I try to be drunk as often as possible
I had sex with her because I didn't want to hurt her feelings.. You're the one who told me I should be more sensitive.
found her sleeping in the closet. woke her up and she said she was camping.
We had to coat check the pizza.
Don't let the fact that shes seen my penis discourage you
He sent me a picture of him bent over showing his asshole with the caption "vwahla".... No more tequila for either of you
I'm lying on the floor in the back room praying my boss doesn't come to work today.never again
When I eventually hook up with a resident lets refer to it as taking a hands on approach to my job
He just showed me how to break a chop stick with his ass.
Somehow ended up home, probably had something to do with the makeshift ladder from my second story window. Now headed to church, still drunk, and still fighting back the vomit of a thousand different alcohols. Successful night.
We just got home a lil bit ago. No sorority girls showed except the ugly swimmer chick and she asked if I've ever faked an orgasm.
You seem to be avoiding the poop question. How did you poop on your hand?
Randomize
