The karaoke bar doesnt have electric avenue. Ill just have to pick another song and sing the lyrics to electric avenue
Only in college do people pre-game a meteor shower
We asked an illegal alien to buy us beer. He didn't even want a tip. I'm going to Washington to plead that case.
Well, I just watched him puke into his pitcher at the bar, I doubt he cares about anything other than the fact that he needs a new beer.
He told me he was in a Proactive commercial. It didn't seem to work for him but he was buying me shots so I slept with him anyways.
Dude he's the best wing man ever. He starts creepin' on a woman, and she clings on to you out of fear.
we did shots in class this morning as part of a presentation. WHY AM I LEAVING THIS COUNTRY?!
She just lifted up her dress, screamed "This is gonna be a good one!" And pissed on the pole...
If you think for one second that I would forget Mardi Gras, you clearly don't know how much I love boobs.
Now the circle is complete. Just interviewed a guy who was a higher up member of the team I worked for in my job before this place
tried to suck my ex boyfriends dick last night at a bar... Happy homecoming from me to you
I was so horny last night, I failed to let him know about my current bed bug infestation.
Why didn't you ever bring me to the pope as a baby so he could kiss me.
Apparently I made a chicken patty, angrily took it out of the microwave, walked outside, and threw it over the balcony. #me
He ate me out while I was playing bejeweled. It was the greatest moment of my life.
Randomize
