i'm sending her a home depot gift card for the hole i put in her wall. call it good?
so my phone autocorrects 'retard' to 'retaaahd'. i LOVE being a masshole!
i think you broke pat's ankle when you drove over it... he's freaking out but on a more serious note i'm 99% sure i saw a werewolf
alcohol. turning childhood friends into awkward hookups since the dawn of civilization.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
Friends help friends remove their foot from the sunroof after an epic smoke sesh.
Im surprised putting the throwing knife "dartboard" next to the door didnt end up worse
well I was pissed. first he yelled at me for having my own condoms, then he got mad when they didn't fit him. Dude, I only fuck magnum men.
SITTING NEXT TO A CIRCUS PERFORMER AT PLANNED PARENTHOOD. THIS IS MY LIFE.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just conducted a skype meeting drunk and in the middle of a cornfield. I don't even think they noticed.
They need 20 oz Capri suns with liquor. Douches need to grow up with their clients
My girl came home. i was jacking off on the couch and she just starts telling me about her day, as if im not half naked with my hand on my cock.
Ok let me just clear up this blowjob thing first so we can talk about your grandpa
I would agree. Whose business is it if I like to guzzle vodka by the liter on my of time? Answer: mine.
His boxer smelled like clean laundry while I was giving him head. It was delightful, like sucking a dick in a spring meadow.
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