There's a vagina buried somewhere in there.
She's holding my hand. I'm going to kill myself.
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
Idk if you've ever had the pleasure of 1. Vomiting on a sidewalk - at 3 in the afternoon 2. Vomiting nachos or 3. Vomiting nachos out of your nose but really I do not advise any of the above.
I never thought I'd say this but my vagina is taking a serious break for awhile
Tonight just feels like one of those I'm going to lose a shoe nights.
I never knew so many sexual things could be done while wearing footie pajamas
The countdown is at hand. We are 15 days from so much Jameson that names will be forgotten. Prepare your liver now or severe projectile vomiting will be the theme of the night.
Does this mean I don't have to apologize for launching about 20 bead necklaces at you from the balcony?
And everyone was looking at me because it was cold and I was drunk and may have screamed "oh fuck" ... You know what, fuck that. What do people think they're getting at Denny's 2 in the morning
I sang him a lovely rendition of 'So Long and Thanks For All the Fish", but replaced fish with dick.
It's six am and her daughter just walked in on her mom and roomful of naked people playing strip spoons. glad Im apart of that childhood memory....
i tried to propose to him with my nipple ring but i couldnt figure out how to take it out
Did you leave ur panties in the sink?
Kitchen or bathroom?
my mom is drunk and is trying to get me to take a picture of her ass. what is life?
Randomize
