so I ended up banging her last night
dude I remember her. You sure it was a her?
i don't even remember
All I remember was yelling at him, "Its becasue of people like you that it took us so long to get to the moon!"
He may or may not be blacked out. We put him to sleep in the community bathroom. He's wrapped in your blanket and he's already puked on it twice. Using your blanket was my idea. Maybe next time you'll ask before taking my vodka.
Have your arms or hands ever gone numb after drinking too much?
Wtf did you do last night?
I just saw a herd of slutty loofahs run down the street...
I'm busy watching infomercials. I'd say I'll join you later, but I'm doing a shot every time they demonstrate how difficult life is WITHOUT this product. So I doubt I'll be able to walk in another... Maybe 40 minutes.
But feel free to join! A new infomercial starts in 12 minutes.
I'm so high. Midnight pancake breakfast in bed
Trimming my pubes at 1 AM, drunk, listening to Stevie Ray Vaughn. What has become of me.
Jesus christ stop updating me about every aspect of your life.
His mom said he was in the ER and asked for prayers and positive thoughts. Apparently, me wishing the clap on him is not what she had in mind.
ditto.
about cumming, not toast
i agree, on both the sex thing and the unrepentant bastard thing
If only I could bank my drunk hookups for a sober IOU.
I have a cat for love and a booty call for sex. What else could I need?
She asked how comfortable I was with her while we were in the shower. She then proceeded to pee in said shower.
im on a boat
How did you get this number?
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