yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
At this point, I would light birthday candles in my vagina for free drinks
i wish i could just chop off my fat with a knife..i would rather endure that than work out
I drunk wandered into my parents bed and slept between them
aparently i pased my english final. I don't even remember taking it.
Its your turn to fuck our RA next time she threatens us with an underage.
i wanna pet his head its so fluffy. were gonna open a petting zoo
she has an amazing ass but I need more beers to get past her horse face. It works out perfect becauseI can use her teeth as a bottle opener.
I woke up to a gnawing sound in the middle of the night and asked him what it was. He told me it was the family of squirrels that lives in the wall and to go back to sleep.
We're knee deep in HJ's right now.
Seriously though, you almost tore my right nipple off.
not only did I call my ex crying but drunk me also deleted the phone log so I had no warning when I saw him in class
Are you rolling a joint while doing homework?
No, I am rolling a joint with my homework.
You ran up to my room. I was naked. You refused to leave without drugs. I love you.
There's wax on my nightstand, my sheets look like Christmas, and my vagina feels like it got into a fight. All signs of a good night
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