She's a black belt cougar in the 6th degree.
I'm being pulled over???
For what!?!?!
??? I'm in a cab!!!!!
you just broke rule number 1. If you can't lift her up don't date her
Either these are mashed potatoes in my pants, or I was drunker than I thought.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And i laid in the yard with carrots on my chest cause i wanted a bunny
I'm crawling around naked in my room looking for my hairbrush. Just thought I'd put that image in your head.
Human Centipede: The Drinking Game. This is non-negotiable. First one to pass out the rest of us get to FEEEEED THEM!
Just found out drinking 6 trays of random shots makes me wake up on a club toilet with my underwear and jeans around my ankles
Not sure how I feel about St Psts and March Madness being on the same weekend. I feel like I've been screwed out of a drunk holiday.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my mom was by far the drunkest one there. best impromptu wednesday afternoon party ever
If our text convos ever saw the light of day lives would be in tatters
Just called a girl a cunt over peanuts. I think we both know it wasn't just about the peanuts.
There's a kid in the back of the class drinking out of a flask. Like what is going on?
NOW HE'S DRINKING OUT OF A HANDLE. WHO IS THIS KID?
Were you seriously humming twinkle twinkle little star while cupping my balls?
He asked me what I wanted for Christmas. I told him an orgasm would be nice.
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