Mines from giving head on hardwood floors.
you need to do more things constructive for your career. like wearing pants more often.
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
we've been dating more than a month and i just realized there's no hair on his chest..
you've had sex with him. you must've seen him naked.
nah, i feel like naked sex would be getting too serious for us..
Just got the orientation leader spot. For the first two days, I will be one of the best looking guys on campus. The freshman girls will be so disappointed they settled for me when everyone else comes back.
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
When my alarm went off, he rolled over and asked me: Bacon or dick? Yes, I will see him again.
Are you around on Saturday? Feeling a trip over
Wet with either fear or sexual excitement
I think a mixture of both is appropriate
You wore a man's plastic top hat last night.
No I didn't. Whiskey did.
We got way too high so we're sitting in the parking lot of the movies trying to figure out what bar to go to
"This must be what Jayden Smith feels like all the time"
You leaned over to me in the elevator and whispered "how long do I have to pretend to be sober?"
he was peeing off the deck shouting "urinals are for pussies" that's how much hurricane.
A girl showed up in my tinder and I have it set to only men... I super liked her because I need a lesbian experience
New life goal: Sex in a parking lot surrounded by a circle of fire.
Randomize
