everything is bigger in texas. Including my drinking problem.
spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
Have you ever had champagne poured on you during sex? It was like a rap video
We were busted for public indecency in the back of my car in the parking lot. This time we were just reading my Cosmo magazine.
he drunkenly pissed himself on the deck, in the bathroom, and on my couch within the span of an hour
its like an avodart commercial...maybe he has a growing problem
WHITE RUSSIAN WEDNESDAY. TELL YOUR CO WORKERS. INVITE QND PREPARE
Well he can play the xylophone with his erect cock... So he's got that going for him
New Halloween costume idea: Frankenstorm. We have three hours. Make it work.
We fucked on a kid's slide, my vagina is singing praises of being used
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but a penn state hat. We are....
I'm on the couch watching HGTV googling giant boob Halloween costumes so life is swell
I literally woke up walked into the bathroom, threw up and died this morning. Then went to my 8am.
I made a booty call at 3:30 am on a Monday... I think I just became the ultimate female fuckboy. I don't know whether to be ashamed or get myself a trophy.
Ever had one of those went so hard last night you woke up at the foot of the bed naked wondering where your phone ended up?
i woke up between my boyfriend and his sister and i don't know if we fucked or cried together
Randomize
