"You squeeze, we tiip biiiiiig" JB
I just went in my fridge and said to my turkey "see you thursday". I seriously have issues
Just because you're using the Hipstamatic app for your nude photo taking, it doesn't make your drunken blowjob pics any classier.
I don't remember her missing an ear while we were at the bar
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
at the hospital. he locked himself in the kitchen, said he was making beer batter shrimp. don't know if it's the mercury poisoning, alcohol poisoning or second degree burns they're holding him for, but i've got a pretty guess.
we've decided to start cutting you off when you can't figure out how to work an ipod.
Yeah. Let's save our goodbyes for when I'm obnoxiously and embarrassingly drunk and more than likely naked.
"If it gets you high just do it" I told him he was the Nike of drug abuse
Question. Was fucking Laura an entirely regrettable decision?
like...quickly.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude random question. Where you with me when the vulture got electrocuted from the power lines and fell on the sidewalk in front of us?
Wife and kids came home early...naked passed out covered in chili cheese Fritos dad will haunt them forever.
You're finding a boat, I'm going to sleep with a guy that lives above a bar and has 24 hour access. We are really nailing this adulting thing
people keep driving by and judging me for drinking natty outside in my underwear at 9 am. rude.
I'm licking blood from my knuckles and I still haven't found my car keys..are you in town tonight?
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
Randomize