i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
he kept asking me "do you love it? tell me you love it" as I was riding him.
and...?
I told him it was alright.
I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
It was a sobriety test blowjob. If he could get it up, he could get me home.
he has a puerto rico area code and says his name is johnny cash. extremely suspect
I've never seen a grown man cry so much after getting jerked off by a stripper. I say it's the best $600 he ever spent.
Get to the bar. Power hour leading up to the rapture.
Okay. But I hope it isn't expensive lingerie. Because I'm ripping it off Hulk Hogan style.
Um of course I blew him. He brought me a shamrock shake. It was two o’clock in the morning on St. Patrick’s Day. There was no smoother move basically. He totally earned that head.
So would it be tacky to offer my services as a future attorney as an engagement gift for her?
Getting sick, pulled the filter off a camel crush and rolled it into my joint to clear my sinuses. If there were stoner awards, I'd receive one.
The security deposit's gone, let's trash this motherfucker
Do you remember ripping my condom off last night while yelling "I DEMAND MY MEAT RAW" like a Viking?
Why can't burritos get me drunk
Met this british guy. Played pool. Broke into an apartment and had sex
Randomize
