She was lying the whole time!
She was a great actress
I was a great dumbass
I called him Han Solo during sex, he looked at me like he was mortified then I realized he came.
keep it on the DL tho cause i dont want it getting out and it coming off like i kidnapped her or something
You guys seriously fuck to bieber? That's embarrassing...
If there is a god, you will have pink eye tomorrow.
I know you think I'm being paranoid, but can you please make sure Danny doesn't rub my wedding invitation on his balls?
My ex just sent me a message asking if she could blow me, but only if we get caught by her new bf. If she promises to swallow I'm doing it.
I jumped out of a moving car going sixty into my driveway because I had to shit so bad. It is not a good day today.
I'm just gonna go with where the wind takes me. if it takes me to his dick, so be it.
Still, being medically ordered to stuff things in your vagina is amazing.
She turned off her phone alarm (which was the theme song to Star Wars) and then asked me if I wanted a blow job before she went...of course I am going to see her again.
1 fuck you 2 fuck her 3 ur forgiven 4 im breaking up with her
my boobs just made me lose a game of beer pong. the balls hit them, bounced off and into the cup. twice. ive never been so disappointed in them.
I am a bad person
You slept with him. Was it good?
I wasnt going to but I was too lazy to blow up the air mattress
I got a free corona t-shirt and all I had to do was drink a beer. This needs to be a more widely accepted form of currency.
Randomize
