I wish Morgan Freeman narrated my life.
Her little brother was home, so we had to hook up while playing hide and seek with him
just gave him road head on the way home IN A SNOW STORM..good thing we didn't crash or I'd be dead. I DIDN'T HAVE MY SEATBELT ON
clearly you have your priorities straight
All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
someone just puked in the library. they put up caution tape. i totally underestimated finals week.
She started crying while we were cooking shrimp because 'Under the Sea" came on Pandora
i would eat my own dick if it were covered in nutella
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
So I've been thinking about this, and I've decided my bed is magic. Every time I change the sheets, a new boy is in my bed. I own the Sheets of Dreams-if I change them, they will come.
Gotta admit I did think about bartering you out to the gay guys for $20 and the dudes flashy neck scarf
Lets think Pancakes and sausages into existence
Cool. I might be making a sickly but incredibly well dressed wine drunk appearance in a couple hours
I thought my sex drive was gone but let me tell you it is back with a vengeance
if he becomes president of the united states, I will tell EVERYONE that i took his virginity.
He may not be good for my soul but he’s great for my vagina!
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